Mental Health issues in Youth and support system

 July 20, 2025

Last night, one of my son’s friends had a mental breakdown. He is a 21-year-old young man. Around midnight, he began frantically ringing the call bell. When I went to attend to him, he appeared visibly disturbed. My son, who is 19, had gone to a classmate’s birthday party. I informed the boy of this. He left quietly, but returned again at 5 a.m., persistently pressing the bell.

We later learned he had been sitting on the stairs since 3 a.m., waiting for the clock’s arm to strike 5. When my wife opened the door, he rushed into my son’s bedroom and sat on his bed for a while, though our son kept sleeping. With great difficulty, he confided to my wife that things were not well at home. A loner, struggling in a difficult nuclear family setup with broken parental ties, he was finding it hard to cope. He longed for a safe space, but his mind wandered endlessly, making him restless and hyper.

He left soon after, but kept returning every half hour. Each time, we offered him water and tried to comfort him. We made it a point to show affection and warmth every time he walked in. This was a boy we had watched grow up with our son. He was an ardent cricket fan, a cheerful boy and always had a joking presence, but was now visibly distressed and deeply troubled.

We could see his condition deteriorating; his mental health issues were escalating. When we woke our son, he told us that at around 12:30 in the night, he had found him loitering aimlessly in the colony. He had walked him back to his house, but the boy was uncontrollable. We later came to know that he was suffering from ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), schizophrenia, and a few other mental health conditions. All these diseases were diagnosed in a year’s time. Our son, his closest friend, had moved to Hyderabad to pursue engineering, and the other two friends had also moved away. The boy was perhaps left without close companionship to share or process his trauma.

I want to share this incident for two reasons. First, to emphasise that when someone struggling with mental health issues reaches out, if even at odd hours, please don’t ignore or judge them. They are not trying to disturb you; they are desperate and seeking help. Be kind, be generous. That compassion might ease their distress and prevent them from taking an extreme step. You never know that your concern, or even one sleepless night (which we often sacrifice for parties), could end up saving a life. One of my friends remarked, "In Delhi, no one cares. But you stayed with him through the night when even his parents didn’t." Perhaps it’s our profession in the police services that has made us more sensitive to such situations.

The second reason I write this is to urge parents to understand that their conflicts, no matter how trivial or grave, leave lasting scars on their children’s minds. Parents may reconcile later, or separate, but the damage to the child is often permanent and irreversible. The harm inflicted can be so deep that it may ruin a child’s future. Being a parent doesn’t give anyone the right to emotionally wreck their child. Parents must be sensitive and responsible.

I was deeply moved by the boy’s suffering, and I feel a sense of guilt and shame for failing a wonderful young lad. Let us start realizing our role in the community, as a parent or as a responsible citizen. Please extend yourself in case you come across a troubled youngster.