Embarrassment and Vulnerability- a reminiscence
Sometimes, being too passionate about something becomes an embarrassment I
realized in one of my trips in the past.
It would be an honest admission that I was ill famed amongst my Humphrey fellowship colleagues in Humphrey School of Public Affairs, University of Minnesota, Minneapolis, USA as being too passionate about Human Trafficking. Sometimes my passion used to get so obsessive that my colleagues used to blame me for being a spoilsport, siphoning off fun from a party and turning the mood. Of course I don’t need to elaborate on this, as it is quite indicative. However, unfortunately they failed to dampen my spirit and I lived my passion to the fullest during my stay in USA in 2012-13.
I personally felt that of late I had become less active in the field of trafficking, as only off and on I had chance to discuss the subject. The opportunity came during my visit to 9th CYMM (Commonwealth Youth Ministers Meeting) at Kampala, Uganda from 31st July to 4th August, 2017. I was there as one of the Indian Delegate in the meeting. We were staying in the Commonwealth resort @ Speke Resort in Munyonyo-Kampala, which was also the venue for the meeting. It was a beautiful property on the banks of lake Victoria. The lake Victoria is the womb from which river Nile was born. It is one of the biggest lakes in the world. The hotel property was owned by an Indian Gujarati and quite a sizeable number of staff were Indians, including most of the chefs.
All day there would be sessions followed by reception in the evening. The participation was huge with representatives from 52 commonwealth countries, sharing and learning in each other’s presence. After reception people would gather in small convenient group and spend some time chitchatting.
The Indian contingent was very cohesive and stayed most of the time together. First three days we would retire late, close to midnight, after exhausting our stock of stories for the day. On the fourth day, 3rd night, each one of us retired early by 930 pm. It was too early to call it a day, but in anticipation of the long traveling day ahead on 4th the decision seemed logical and practical.
After reaching room I realized that I had forgotten my kit bag, presented by organizers, in the conference room. The conference room was an independent structure at the other end of the property. I came back to the reception to register my loss. The person at reception inquired with the person heading that section in the daytime. To my delight he informed that my missing kit was tracked. He promised to get it delivered next morning.
The reception was in a big lobby, which was artistically and aesthetically decorated. On one side it opened to a beautiful sitting arena with a bar and cafeteria. This area further opened to a huge lawn in acres at the shore of lake Victoria. It was scenic marvel. I found many of the delegates from other countries sitting in the open cafeteria in groups. It was good opportunity to get introduced to some, I felt.
When I stepped out of the lounge area and stepped into the open sitting space, just at the gate on the very first table were three girls sitting and sipping their beer. One of them said, ‘ Excuse me, can I talk to you’. This was quite common in such get together to interact and getting self-introduced. I went to their table and showed my delight to getting introduced. However, to my astonishment a voluptuous girl got up and suggested if we could sit on the next table. It was little weird. When we settled she out-rightly asked if I would invite her to my room. The signal was very clear. I smiled and told her that I was not interested. She said that it would be not very expensive. This was for the first time that someone had straight away solicited. It was more surprising because it was a five star property and an international conference like commonwealth was underway.
She insisted and started negotiating with promise to provide all fun. I told her bluntly that I was against the concept of women soliciting for money. Interestingly she said that I should then take her to my room, chat and then hand over hundred dollar bill. If that seemed too much then even 50 dollars would be good. Using her body or not would be my prerogative. I denied with a smile and requested her to not waste time on me and rather chase someone else. Her nonchalance and pursuance carried the discussion little longer and it generated interest in me to know more about her and the modus operandi. The research fellow in me suddenly became alive and I became lively in interviewing. As informed, she was a single mother from Rawanda with a two year old daughter. In the day time she worked in some salon. Her mother would take care of her daughter in the night when she would come to the hotel and woo customers. They would wait till wee hours of the morning. Many men spent time sitting and drinking with them in the lobby and many would take them to their room. They had to pay 30 percent of the income to the person at the reception, in case they were taken to the room. After realizing that there was nothing more she would divulge I thanked her and left for my room. She was certainly disappointed for failing to make any headway.
As I entered the lobby space again I found the Commonwealth organizers standing there. Mr Sushil saw me and complained that in this visit I had hardly squeezed time for him. He invited me for a drink. At the same time a senior official from Malaysia came and joined us. The three of us came out and again sat in the outer area and ordered a drink. We got engaged in discussion. The girls soliciting were seated little away and were covered by the pillar in between. So I had no view of them. We sat for almost an hour and then decided to part. When we got up the girl sitting next to our table used the same language, ‘Excuse me’. Immediately I figured out that she also was soliciting. She looked so much like any delegate from some African country. Earlier I had mistaken her for some delegate waiting for some colleague. She had never gone to those girls sitting on other table neither had she solicited anyone all the time we sat and chatted.
Her way of stopping us was enough indication to figure out her intention. We just overlooked and started walking away with mere ‘Hi and thank you’. She said that I just want a minute. We stopped. She clearly indicated that she wanted to speak to me, ‘I want to talk to him for a minute please’. I was little surprised to see someone being so choosy in soliciting. Sushil said that he would be waiting and moved on. She politely requested me to sit. I told her that I was comfortable standing, as I wanted to leave. The same dialogue repeated, ‘Can I join you to your room’. I smiled and said that she should not waste her time on me. It seemed to be retake of same scene except that the lady character had changed.
However, I was taken by surprise when she said, ‘I have been watching you for a while and I think I have fallen for you. I like you!’
I did not remember having met her earlier in the conference days. I was again confused, if she was one of the delegates, and just wanted to spend some time together. In all my years of international traveling not a single person had tried to woo me. I wanted to reconfirm if she was trying to seduce commercially or was a delegate trying to be overfriendly.
‘What do you expect?’ I questioned to clear my doubts.
’50 dollars is good enough!’ prompt she replied.
I smiled and informed her that I was not interested.
She looked in my eyes and with a seductive smile said, ‘I don’t mind if you do not pay. I think I have fallen in love and want to spend some quality time with you.’ I could sense the trap.
‘Have we met before,’ I enquired.
‘No, but I have been watching since you entered this area,’ she said.
‘Excuse me, not interested', I told her politely.
‘I repeat again, I am in love. I am not intending to charge you anything. Please tell me your room number and I will join after some time,’ she was emphatic. ‘And I also want to tell you clearly that I am not one of them,’ she said.
‘How are you different,’ I asked.
‘They are from Rwanda and I am from Uganda,’ she said. ‘I am not like them,’ she seemed to be hurt.
‘Ok!’ I tried not to antagonize her. ‘What do you do,’ I asked pretending that she was not a sex worker.
‘I have a boutique and it does good business,’ she said. ‘I come sometimes to this hotel to have beer. After following you for some time I have started liking you. Can I join you now,’ she repeated.
She was using this word ‘like’ and ‘love’ too seductively and too frequently. It sounded more like a trap than affection.
‘No thanks,’ I said and turned to leave. By that time I saw Sushil rushing towards me.
‘Brother, let us go,’ he hastily held my hand and dragged me inside the lobby worried. ‘It is not worth it here,’ he said.
I started laughing loud though embarrassed. ‘Do you think I was taking her bait,’ I asked.
‘Certainly people fall for that,’ he said.
‘Of course,’ I agreed.
I was embarrassed that Sushil had perhaps misread me and made the situation look as if he was my savior.
For me this situation was giving me ample fodder to understand a particular modus operandi in such properties.
We both parted.
Once in room I googled to check the credentials of this hotel. Surprisingly, one of the comment in ratings had categorically mentioned that the hotel turns into a brothel in the night.
In the morning I called couple of persons at the reception who were from India. I asked them if the management was aware of the night situation. He very shyly admitted that it was known to all. They do not officially promote but however it was never denied, and decided not to stop this. He agreed to the complicity of the management. While having breakfast I again questioned the stewards and chef who were Indians. Their answer was more diplomatic. One of them questioned me asking what could they do if someone comes to the bar to drink. How could they stop them? Though this statement did not sound convincing.
It was very unfortunate that such big five star properties were leaving their customers vulnerable. Normally, when a person is high (after couple of drinks) then they drop their guard, and the vulnerability is exposed. Leaving such vulnerability to be exploited was what seemed be the strategy adopted. Situation could any time convert into a crime.
And, I was also concerned about the element of trafficking. Were these Rwanda girls trafficked or were they soliciting on their own volition. The story of the Rawanda girl seemed to be a saga of struggle for survival. May be they were victims of an organised crime. Lot was left unanswered to me. I had to leave that afternoon so I had no time to investigate further and do a reality check. But certainly, in either condition, the situation was not very conducive for the customers nor for the girls soliciting.
